There is one event in my life that hits me on a daily bases, the feeling of a sickening gnawing deep within my stomach and I remember with stark clarity, that moment.

I was thirteen years old and had been allowed on a holiday with my best friend at the time and her family. We arrived at the caravan site full of excitement of what adventures the holiday may hold.

As with all teenage girls we had one thing on our minds, Boys. For Laura, a slim, tall, blonde girl who idolised her fashionable older sister it was easy but for me, a short, obese, brunet tom boy, who learnt everything from the boys next door, it was impossible.

One unforgettable day Laura decided that we would dress up and go to the pier to find a guy she fancied. It seemed like a good idea at the time, she picked out some of her sister’s clothes for me and did my hair and make-up. There were no mirrors in this trailer and I, stupidly, believed her when she said “You look lovely”. Little liar!

When we got to the pier there we made a beeline to the arcade, we played a few games, hung out and tried to look cool until we found him and his gang. They swaggered towards us in their leather jackets and low hung jeans some staring at Laura and some pointing and laughing at me. As we were leaving the arcade with them I got sight of myself in a mirrored doorway and the laughs became painfully clear.

There I was frizzy hair, thick Pat Butcher make-up, a short floral pink dress which barely covered my huge bum and calf length high heeled boots which were too tight causing a blob of fat to hang over the top. I automatically felt physically sick with sheer embarrassment. Cold sweats and shivering took over as I ran back to the campsite weeping hysterically and wishing I would just disappear.

That night I cried myself to sleep. I didn’t leave the caravan for the rest of the holiday. That was the day I promised myself I would never ever let myself feel like that ever again. I put myself on a diet threw out my wardrobe and went to beauty school to learn how to make the best out of myself and I never leave the house without checking my appearance.

Since then I have learnt that it doesn’t matter what I looked like, what defines me and makes me beautiful is that I would never do that to anybody or judge anyone on their appearance. Its whats inside that counts!