Today has been the third day in a row where I have driven to some historic castle or chateau only to find that it is closed. I’m staring to get the impression that the whole of France is closed or they just don’t want to share their history with the British.

I get an image of a French man clad in stripes with a beret with a coffee on a white fenced balcony on the look out for any Brits that may come to the village. “Lock your doors” he shouts and grannies scramble to close everything. In moments the entire place looks like a death town. I can’t prove this theory of course.

But for the last three days I have found the tourist office and asked when the place of interest is open, and they always say “you have to get the key from….” The first one was from the bakery, the second was kept by the butcher and today’s key, well I think she made up a word to be honest. All three were either closed or never found.

This is beside the point. The fact is I don’t feel comfortable when I have the keys to a friends car or flat let alone the key to a 15th century castle. It’s too much responsibility, I mean, what’s their lock smith situation like? I haven’t seen one since if been here and how would a locksmith deal with a historic lock?

Could you imagine it? sorry entire village I just lost the key to your most historic prized possession.

Why don’t they just leave it open? It’s not like people are going to steal anything and if they did I’m sure someone in the village will notice a person walking about with a 15th century massive tapestry or chair. I mean leave it open, get someone to sit there, ask for a few euros and hey presto your making money. That’s better than people turning up, going on a key hunt and then leaving. You would even make money from the tourists buying stuff and eating.

Tomorrow I will try again, maybe I will get lucky and find something open. Perhaps everything closes Saturday to Monday?